My Mission Statement!
I’d always been a hopeless romantic, waiting for that prince on a white horse to come and kiss me for our happily ever after. Deep down in my heart, I always yearned for a deep relationship with a man who can complete me. I always thought my other half was out there somewhere. Although not consciously, I always looked for that man in every man I met. With a story in my mind, “You will know your person when you find him!”
The majority of my adulthood was driven by this story.
Since the age of 17, I had always been in a romantic relationship, believing our union will live till eternity from the first minute I met my exes.
Although I kept hoping for a fairytale, on the contrary, my relationships were full of drama, conflict, tension, and fights.
When I was 23, I got involved in a relationship with a narcissist and got engaged to him at 24. It was such an abusive relationship that eventually, I lost my confidence, my body posture changed, and I started to stutter… Moreover, I started to question my sanity. I started to seek professional support.
After a year of therapy, finally I reclaimed my power and ended that toxic relationship after 3 years. That’s when I had my spiritual awakening, became a yoga and mindfulness teacher, and gave myself to teaching spirituality and hosting women’s circles to empower women.
Only 6 months after my breakup, I found myself in another relationship. Instant connection, breathtaking kiss on the first night… And a disappointing breakup in a year…
At that time, I was 28, a manager in a corporate, and also a successful spiritual teacher who had achieved all the material possessions and status that society called success… Except for marriage. Therefore, the next item on my achievement list was to get married. 4 months after my last breakup, there again, I found myself in love.
Love at first sight, engaged in 10 months, married in a year, divorced in two years…
After the divorce, I was so sure that I wouldn’t be able to find that man I’d been searching for.
But then I fell in love again super fast.
And again, so sure of this was gonna be the last!
It only lasted 8 months. I began the relationship with great hopes, and ended the relationship again with great disappointments and a fit of huge anger!!
Questions and Reflections
As a spiritual teacher and a woman who had been through physical, emotional, mental, and s€xual abuse in most of her romantic relationships, I started to question what is the true meaning of mindfulness and spirituality if they do not improve the quality of your relationships.
After my last breakup, I promised myself a year of solitude and celibacy; committed to being the lover I’ve always wanted to have and experiencing divine love with myself.
I finally awakened from the lie of finding someone to complete me!
Because I was not missing.
I stopped looking for the other half!
Because I was not a half.
I have become fully aware of my wholeness and decided to fall in love with myself, fully satisfied and content with my solitude.
I used this time of contemplation to analyze and reflect on my life, relationships, and career, dedicated to building a liberated life and enjoying my life to the fullest.
While reflecting on my romantic history, I noticed some recurring patterns.
All my relationships started with an immediate attraction, instant familiarity, intense chemistry, and deep passion, followed by amazing s€x!
The next thing I know, oops I’m in a relationship again!
Relationships that start with light speed and end with great disappointments and resentments…
Falling for manipulative, emotionally unavailable, and abusive men who demand I change the way I talk, walk, and dress. The men who demand I shrink my intensity, sensitivity, and wild soul.
The men who can not see me, hear me, honor me.
The men who are unable to meet my needs.
The men who think I am too much.
The men whom I give my power away.
The men whom I end up mothering.
Ignoring red flags, betraying my intuition, minimizing my needs, settling for less than I deserve, prioritizing the relationship over myself, and giving my all to make them happy, satisfied, and successful…
A Deeper Look at the Wounds of Womanhood
I am a woman who was born and raised in Turkey and grew up in a conservative society where the freedom of women is restricted based on gender roles and religion, where the freedom of women is considered consent to mistreating, disrespecting, slut-shaming, abusing, or even killing women!!
Ever since the Victorian era, most societies developed strict expectations of us to be, act, speak, dress, and conduct ourselves in a specific way to be acceptable, appropriate, or desirable.
Women are placed in a gender role that suggests being “a lady”: acting, looking, speaking in a stereotyped way to be chosen by a wealthy man, and then giving birth and sacrificing themselves for the sake of their family as if it was women’s responsibility to please men and keep the family together. And men are expected to be the protector, the provider, and the authority. Women began to compete with women for a man’s attention and care.
However, until recently, I was unaware of how deeply this programming was embedded into my subconscious, and how all my decisions were driven by this pattern when it comes to building a relationship with a man.
The more I analyzed my relationship patterns and the relationship dynamics in society, the more I gained direction in my career. The curtains were slowly lifted from my eyes and I was able to see where my heart had been pushing me for years!
A new sense of purpose in life presented itself, crystal clear.
Since I was a teenager, my dream has been to inspire a new education system for the next generations based on mindfulness, empowerment, authenticity, conscious connecting, and creativity with my teachings. I have been teaching spirituality, mindfulness, and human nature, coaching on conscious living and relationships, hosting healing events and women’s circles, and offering many alternative health services since 2016.
But it was not until this solitude and celibacy episode of my life, that I was able to connect the dots…
As Rumi said, “The wound is the place where light enters you.”
The wisdom you gain through your wounds eventually becomes your responsibility to share and shed light on others.
My womanhood wounds and the wisdom born from my personal relationship experiences and failures gave me clarity on my divine mission and recalibrated my career path.
If I want to leave an enhanced education system to the next generations, I must first educate women about conscious romance so they can honor their needs, make conscious choices for their life partners and raise their kids in a physically and emotionally safe and secure and mindful environment.
After all, aren’t parents a child’s first and most important teacher?
Yet, it all starts with women!
As women, we all feel the endless sorrow of being a woman in a society shaped around outdated values and the bitter pain of living in a world made for men, made by men.
The men who claim the right to have a say even in the decisions we should make about our lives, our appearances, and our bodies!
However, what we all forget is women are the fertile soil that gives life.
Women are the portals that can bring souls into physical beings.
Women have the power to “allow” humanity to continue!!
The true nature of the female is “to choose” the right environment and the right seed for life to continue in a more evolved way.
Not to be chosen.
The true nature of the female is “to lead the new era” that is meant to be born into existence.
Not to be led.
This leadership is not the authority, power, or domination we know of. It is the natural leading of life, leading the next generations of humanity as gatekeepers of life.
Therefore, as the souls who choose to be in a female body in this life, it is primarily our responsibility to awaken and claim our sovereignty to contribute to the evolution of consciousness since we are the gateway to future generations.
As a woman who had to fight for my freedom and sovereignty in this man-made world, I have finally awakened to my true mission!
With pride and confidence, now I’m speaking it into existence: I am here to activate the divine feminine.
That’s why I have always been so passionate about women’s empowerment and built the Wise Wild Wombmen community 3 years ago. I am here to teach women how to awaken the Shakti essence within and be badass goddesses, so we can choose the right lovers and lay a healthy foundation for a conscious family and a healthy lineage to be born!
I prepared a cut-to-the-chase online course!
Sisters! I will soon offer you a cut-to-the-chase masterclass where you will understand your relationship patterns and how to build a conscious romance with a man! We will dive deep into analyzing why we like some men immediately, how we fall in love, and why we end up repeating similar scenarios when it comes to love!
I also birthed a new book into creation!
“Activate Divine Love: A Spiritual Path to Establish Conscious Relationships and Communities” is a self-help book that delivers a simple and applicable roadmap for you to integrate your divinity with your humanity and experience divine love through healthy and conscious human connections!
At the beginning of 2022, I set my intentions to publish one multi-author collaboration and write one solo book by the end of the year. Today, I am happy to have realized both of my intentions. Activate Divine Love will take its place on shelves this year!
And I’m looking forward to sharing my new offerings with a renewed and expanded vision with all sisters who are done with the bullshit and settling for less, who are ready to reclaim their power and be the “chooser” rather than being “chosen”!
It’s a new dawn, it’s a new day, it’s a new life for all women in the world!
And I’m feeling good mamacitas! Let’s begin!
Aho!
