Femininity Practices

Embracing femininity is a challenge for many wombmen. Actually, it’s a challenge for most of us regardless of gender because it’s been an inherited wound for many generations.

In ancient philosophies, it’s mentioned that this universe is built in duality starting from the divine energies. The divine union has been divided into two as the divine masculine and the divine feminine. Furthermore, according to the ancient scriptures, the whole purpose of this life is to make these two one again. Once we unite the divine masculine and the divine feminine within ourselves, it’s inevitable to create the divine union within the universe since the creation is merely a reflection of our inner worlds; as within so without. 

As stated in ancient eastern wisdom, the divine feminine energy (which we call “Kundalini” or “Shakti” in yoga philosophy) resides in the sleeping state in our root chakra, and to reach the union, one should awaken this divine feminine energy and ascend it to the crown chakra where the divine masculine energy (“Shiva”) resides. For most of us, unfortunately, the divine feminine energy is still in the sleeping state. 

What is the Divine Masculine, what is the Divine Feminine?

Let’s dive a little deeper into these divine energies and understand the qualities of them since we need both of them to operate in balance and harmony.

The Divine Masculine is Yang.

It’s active. It’s the initiator, the actor, the act of “doing” itself.
It’s the fire, the light. It’s logical and analytical, it’s rational.
It’s the problem solver, it’s goal-oriented and strong.
It’s the fixer and the achiever!
The divine masculine energy also brings individuality, it’s competitive and territorial. 

The Divine Feminine is Yin.

It’s passive, it’s the serenity, the act of “being”.
It’s the water, it’s dark. It’s emotional and intuitive, it’s creative.
It’s receptive, flexible, and ever-changing. It’s vulnerable.
It’s the acceptance itself.
The divine feminine energy is collective, it brings inclusiveness and collaboration.

Divine Energies are not related to gender!

Regardless of gender, we all carry these divine energies within and we need a healthy masculine and feminine to be our best versions. As we can see from the traits of these divine qualities, the era and the system we live in lacks the qualities of the divine feminine and we mostly operate from our wounded masculine energy that causes an outraged separation due to the dominance of individuality. We lost the connection with collectivism.

As empowered wombmen, it’s a must for us to awaken the divine feminine qualities in our lives first. As the divine feminine keeps sleeping, it reflects into our reality as suppressed feminine wounds. As a consequence, it’s our duty to bring balance into these divine energies. It’s essential for wombmen to eradicate this ancestral dysfunction to have joyful and balanced lives.

We already took a step towards it by allowing ourselves to be vulnerable in our circle.

What else we can do to heal these ancestral wounds? How can we awaken the divine feminine energy?

Here are some practices:

1- Connect with your womb.

For wombmen; our womb is where our sacral chakra resides and it is the center of creativity and pleasure. We give birth, we give life, we create through our womb. When we do not use our creativity, and/or when we do not allow ourselves to experience pleasure; the chi (or reiki, or prana which means the life force) gets blocked in our womb, and this blockage reveals itself in the form of reproductive system issues. Painful and irregular periods, ovary problems, cysts, etc…

Affirmations and visualizations are the perfect tools to connect with our womb for bringing balance to our sacral chakra. 

Practice 1 – Lay down for 5 mins, place both hands on the womb, and repeat the affirmations below silently while visualizing an amber light is flowing from your hands and filling your womb:

• I love being a wombman.
• I love my womb.
• My sensuality and sexuality are sacred.
• I allow myself to experience pleasure. 
• Pleasure and sexuality are my birthrights. 
• I have endless creativity.
• I use and express my creativity in infinite ways.

2- Connect with your female ancestors.

Let me give you an interesting information. Did you know, while a female fetus grows in the womb of the mother, the eggs that the fetus is going to carry for a lifetime are also being formed? In other words, the egg that is fertilized and created you is originated in your grandmother’s womb. Isn’t it crazy? That’s another reason of why we carry a deep feminine wound from our past generations mostly as wombmen. 

There is also another important fact that we all need to know. Our subconscious codes the memories, the emotions, and the sensations between “0-7 ages”. We say age zero, because the creation and the interaction of neurons begins in the 7th week of embryonic development. Which means, the cognitive activities of a fetus such as perception, logic, reason, and thoughts start in the womb of mother. Hence whatever the mother experiences, thinks, feels during pregnancy are directly coded in the subconscious of the baby. Most of us unknowingly suffer from the emotions that are inherited from our ancestors and embedded in our subconscious. 

Practice 2 – Try to have more information about your lineage. How was the pregnancy of your mom with you? What about your grandmother’s pregnancies? What kinds of hardships they’ve been through during pregnancy? Then journal and reflect on how you can relate to those experiences and emotions in your own life. 

Practice 3 – Sit for meditation in a comfortable position. Place your palms on your knees. Bring your awareness to your breath. Exhale and inhale deeply and slowly. Now, see yourself sitting in a room and invite all the wombmen in your ancestry to the room. Imagine the room is the womb of the Divine Mother, made from pure white light. Visualize, that white light surrounds everyone, and clears and takes away all the suffering from all with each breath you take. 

3- Work with frequencies.

The color of the sacral chakra is orange.

Practice 4 – Wear orange, eat orange-colored foods. 

The mantra of the sacral chakra is VAM.

Practice 5 – Repeat the mantra loudly as much as you want.

4- Masturbate, and explore your sexuality. Stop faking orgasms.

Sexual energy is super powerful and vital. It should be used and experienced in a healthy way, with awareness. Especially the wombmen had to suppress their sexuality as a consequence of many different pressures. In most parts of the world, it is shameful for a wombman to have a free sexual life. Because of this, most wombmen are also ashamed to get in touch with their bodies, their sensuality and sexuality. Since masturbation is also a shameful act in many cultures, many wombmen explore their sexuality through a partner without self exploration. By reason of not knowing the sexual drives and needs, most wombmen end up having unsatisfying sexual experiences and faking orgasms. To break this nonsense cycle, it’s really so important to connect with our bodies with no shame.

Sexuality a part of our nature. It is not shameful; it’s sacred. Sexuality is a birthright of every human being and should be explored and expressed with no shame, with no fear; but only with celebration and respect.

Practice 6 – Have a look at your vaginas in the mirror, release shame from your body. Playfully delve into your sensuality, and explore your pleasure points in your sexual organ so you can confidently guide your partners during sexual intercourse. If you do not know how to satisfy yourself, how can someone else know it for you? Be honest with yourself and get intimate with yourself.

Remember, sex is not a skill; it’s a deep connection that comes from self-awareness. Get a toy for your own sexual exploration rituals if you want! Allow yourself to experience pleasure and celebrate your sexuality!!

5- Find a creative outlet for yourself. 

As we mentioned, our womb is not just related to pleasure but also related to creativity as well. We’re emotional beings and it’s essential for us to have a healthy outlet to channel those emotions. 

Practice 7 – Sing, draw, dance, play an instrument, write stories… Find the best creative channel for yourself and stick to it. Stop telling yourself that you are not creative, you can not sing, you can not dance, etc. Remember that every human being has endless creativity. It might be buried, yet it’s always there. Allow yourself to get in touch with your undiscovered gifts.

6- Practice receiving, instead of providing. Allow yourself to be vulnerable.

With the suppressed feminine, the misunderstanding between nurturing and providing has appeared. Let’s make these terms clear.

Providing means making available, to supply. On the other hand, nurturing is caring for and encourage growth. Nurturing is more like emotional presence and support, meanwhile providing is more material. Providing is a divine masculine trait while nurturing is the main quality of the divine feminine.

Most of us have been raised to become independent and strong wombmen. Hence we forgot how to ask for our needs, ask for support from others, and we became providers. Remember, as humans, we are all vulnerable. We do not have to provide everything we need all alone. We need each other. It’s ok to be supported. Giving and receiving should always be in balance, we can not be only givers or receivers. 

Practice 8 – Practice showing up in your vulnerability and ask for support. Allow others to have the joy of giving as well.

Strength comes from courage, and courage comes from vulnerability. Wait, what did I just say? It seems contradictory, right? But yes, you read it right. Wikipedia defines courage as:

Courage is the choice and willingness to confront agony, pain, danger, uncertainty, or intimidation.

Now please tell me, aren’t agony, pain, uncertainty, and intimidation the vulnerable parts of being human? All of these are humanly and ok. Do not fear to show your vulnerability and allow others to love and support you as you are. Practice receiving.

If you want to learn more about these concepts, here is an amazing documentary film from Prof. Brene Brown about vulnerability and courage.

https://www.netflix.com/title/81010166

7 – Practice Yoga regularly.

Yoga is an ancient philosophy that exists over 5000 years. Physical exercises of yoga (asanas) are designed to awaken the Kundalini energy and rise it to the crown. That’s the hidden secret behind yoga that differs it from other physical disciplines.

This is how we balance our outer worlds!

As we awaken the divine feminine energy in individual levels, and as we harmonize the divine feminine and the divine masculine, we create harmony in the universe. As we experience the divine union within, the balance of these energies reflects outside as well.

Let’s be the change, my beautiful goddesses!

So it is,

Aho!